Donuts are diet food???

I came to that realization at about 12:30 this after noon.. just a few moments ago... that I believe that donuts are diet food! I know it's not true, but it has been for me for a long, long time... Let me explain.

One time in my early life it was my joy and pleasure to sit with the 'women's group' on Tuesday mornings. My Mom's girlfriends would come over, they would eat donuts, drink coffee or iced tea and talk about diets and weight loss and other such gossip, so I learned to associate donuts as a food you eat when you talk about diets. I learned that I must diet to be thin and acceptable, and as I grew up, I decide that diet and donut went together. Indeed, when I did not lose enough weight, I ate more donuts. Then I had the desire to lose weight again and after failing, eat more donuts.. I loved the donuts, I created the experience of failure because eating donuts does not make one lose weight. The donuts served as both the nurturing from the good memories of being allowed to watch the women and listen to their secrets, satisfaction of the warm, sweet taste it left in my mouth. Please realize that by donuts I mean donuts, but to a much broader extent, I mean all sweets, mostly.

I realize how much effect our memories have on our present moment. Actually it seems that we create our present moment out of the memories of the past. It is our consciousness and our willingness to allow the greater consciousness of humanity to guide us OR the greater will of that greater/wiser part of yourself that is connected to everything, including, but not limited to the All of the All.
I notice that when I limit my consciousness to the greater consciousness of humanity, I don't seem to have as positive, joyful results as when I harness my consciousness to the greater Good of All.

For the past14 years I have been descending down into a private, personal hell that cumulated, I believe when I got fired last January. I am still hurt and I am still wanting to blame their malicious acts for my demise but the truth is that it was my own consciousness, my own beliefs, the contrast between what I was doing and what I wanted to BE. The Good won out, it always does, but because I believed I couldn't make the choices myself, I was buoyed around by the will of my place of work and that will was not healthy for me. Totally against my ethics and I felt I was unethical working there. Yet fear of poverty and depravity kept me there. I loved my job, but the place was sick..

The point was, that after that I fell to the bottom of my bottom. I became very withdrawn and inward bound, went through some pretty hellish places in my own consciousness. When I was 22 I promised myself that I would do what ever it took for my own conscious evolution, no matter how painful it felt. I always have known that I was always loved and cared for by something greater, stronger, wiser than myself. In the pit of my own depression I revived that intention, to walk through what was there, regardless of how 'hard or painful' it might be. I had no where to go but up. I had a passion for life so intense that I could not let up, yet the contradictory statement of my life was that I seemed to believe that I MUST lose everything before I could gain anything. So, I did. Lose everything. I was still taken care of, though.. and when I started allowing the Universe, Spirit, God to take care of me, I was taken care of in ways that I could not fathom before and it was amazing! (yes, Patricia, amazing!!) awesome, fabulous, mythical, magical every day experience! As I released the need to HAVE, I was given more than I could imagine.

Today is my 41st birthday, the start of my 42nd year and my 6th cycle on this planet... I know that this year will hold as much good as I can imagine and I've realized that I have NO limits to my imagination, so I suspect I have no limits to what I can achieve, have, give, share and allow! I intend to fully accept my good from now until I become my good, which will happen later, when I am ready.. Becoming my good! All the spiritual Masters have taught that!

So, no.. Now I know that donuts are not diet food.. I can choose health a lot more easier now that I know that I have changed my thinking! Spirituality promises me that when I change my thinking, my life changes, too!

Mitzi